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Positive Attitudes.... from Heart-Links.com |
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Lunacy at its Finest ... Crazymakers and Intimidators In Your Life!Did you ever run into that person that just nags and picks and scares you into submission? How about that person that appears to turn your world upside-down? What about that person that literally sucks the energy right out of your soul? Believe it or not, these people do exist and they can affect you in ways you never thought possible. --- Crazymakers --- A Crazymaker is someone who feeds on negative energies and tends to pull everyone around them into major melodramas. They are the type of people who have to either be the savior, the "I told you so", or the center of a situation. They will do anything to take a calm and easy situation and turn it into a disaster to place them in the middle. They will then come in and act as though it was your fault just to feed off of your negative vibes and become the hero. Then, when you confront them about their ways, they feel as though you're projecting your own weaknesses onto them and they suddenly begin to behave like a psychologist. Or, they will turn from their brutal ways into a simple victim and wonder why the world hates them so much. I have known several Crazymakers in my life and, sadly, in my early years, I fell for their behaviors simply because I was not wise enough to know what they were doing. They worked hard to gain my trust and then turned around and created so much turmoil that it was as though I was caught in a tornado. I turned from a confident individual to a half-witted cow caught in the updraft of the spiraling winds! There are several ways to deal with a Crazymaker, but the best way is to simply let them roam in their self-loathing world --- you need to simply stay away. But, you have to be quick enough to identify these types of people because, amazingly enough, they strike fast and hard and the minute you falter, they jump in like vultures on a dead carcass. --- Intimidators --- While Crazymakers go out of their way to achieve power through chaos and negative energies, Intimidators go out of their way to achieve power from fear. These types of people are calm and cool on the outside and mean-spirited on the inside. They tend to work against you to instill self-doubt and act as though "they have you pegged." They do this using pre-determined scripts into which they try to place you so that they can control your moods and direction. In the end, as you become frustrated and fall into their scripts that define whom "they think you should be," they too increase their levels of angst to keep you down and under their spell. The best way to deal with such a person is to simply let them run through their scripts and avoid falling prey to their imposed directions. They are not easy to spot as they tend to become your best friend and then, they slowly turn the situation to their personal benefit. You never know what hit you because the transition occurred at a slow pace and you begin to think it's your own fault for the failure of the situation. --- What's next? --- Crazymakers and Intimidators enjoy their task because it gives them satisfaction in knowing that they have taken control over a situation. They are interested in predetermined responses to their actions. This is important to them because, generally, they don't have control over anything else in their lives. Additionally, by making you look less than desirable allows them to feel as though they are better than you and those around them. In the end, it is easier for them to live off of the negative energies that they create. They cannot live in a world of positive energies and "equals" because they feel inferior to other human beings. Crazymakers and Intimidators are smart in that they know how to manipulate people and situations in what they think of as a "test of survival." However, they don't know how to react when their ploys don't work. Your best bet is to notice these types of personalities and put them on the back burner. Any type of response in their favor pushes the ball further into their court. Over the years I have generalized some signs that come in handy for determining if either of these personalities is near. If someone comes to you and purposefully says something that goes completely "against your grain," then they are an Intimidator. If someone dramatizes a situation or somehow works to play one side against another simply to become the savior, they're a Crazymaker. However, over time, if you observe others, you will be able to recognize these types of people and identify your own "tell-tale" indicators. About The Author Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics! For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or http://www.toupin.com! Copyright (c) 2004 Edward B. Toupin
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Embrace Change We all have a unique way of communicating our story, a way that reflects our life experience. The photographer uses a camera, the artist a brush, and the musician a melody or rhythm. A Major Block to Constructive Change A Yale University study a few years ago revealed that the average child is scolded - criticized - over 20,000 times between the ages of two and ten. Mom says, "No, Charlie - don't touch that!" Or a teacher says, "Jackie, that's not the way to do it!" All those "Nos" and "shouldn'ts" add up to a predisposition toward self-criticism that we must look at before we can truly change our lives. Teens And Positive Living If you are a parent, it is up to you to keep your children positive. It is up to you to contribute to not only their physical well being, but also their emotional well being. Taming Your Gremlin "Who am I fooling?" "I'm a loser," "I'm too old," "I'm fat," "I'm not smart enough," "I have no talent," "I'll never finish it," "It's too late," "I'm not good enough," and on and on.Sound familiar?Have you ever started a project or had an idea, only to abandon it as soon as negative self-talk arose? You know what I mean ~ those nasty little voices that stop you from getting what you want?The longer I work with people, the more convinced I am that a majority of suffering could be alleviated by the simple task of taming one's Gremlin (or gremlins). |
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