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Happiness Information.... from Heart-Links.com |
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Getting Connected"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." -James Oppenheim Today is very special. Besides being your "un-birthday", it's the first day of the rest of your life. We've all heard that one. We acknowledge the wisdom and move on --- checking our watches and calendars to see how long before the "good stuff" starts happening. Our impatience and anxiety prevent us from focusing our awareness on "now". As a result we never discover it's full potential or give ourselves permission to enjoy it. We recognize many important holidays on the calendar; Christmas, New Years etc...and these are the times when we have permission to celebrate. Surprisingly, many people report having "depression" around the holidays. Could it be that our enjoyment muscles have grown flabby or that we've been driving ourselves nuts to get there. Just as we don't have permission to enjoy "now", we also don't have permission to enjoy "here". We can't wait to go on vacations to visit the "good places" We're certainly not allowed to enjoy our jobs. We want to move on so that we get to be with the "smart people". Within any given day, certain places and times are more important than others: --- getting to work --- and once we're there --- getting home. Meal times are "biggies" --- important events. Is it any wonder that many of us have weight problems. Where am I going with this? We shouldn't go to work? We shouldn't eat? No. Go ahead and do all those things. You'll do them much better when you learn to slow down and connect. The difference is that you'll feel better about things. Connect to what? To "here" and "now": Our immediate experience separated from what the Zen masters call "the monkey mind" --- our obsessive conceptualizing and labeling of things. The ability to practice "non-thinking" and focus on immediate experience is called "mindfulness". In other words, when you're washing the dishes, you're washing the dishes. Non-thinking is not easy. It's a habit which has to be learned. The key is attention to our breathing. It provides something on which to focus. Starting your day with a daily "non-thinking" exercise or meditation is the best thing you can do if you want to connect. It provides a fresh image of what it feels like to relax. You can accomplish this in as little as ten minutes or even less once you're used to it. Just find a comfortable spot and relax. Clear your mind of all thoughts --- even the one's you think are important. Pay attention to your breathing. Don't force it. Your body knows how to breathe without you telling it to. Just go along for the ride. But, breathe through you nose. For some reason it helps. If thoughts intrude (and they will!), simply redirect your attention to your breathing. If you're unsure about how long you should do this, just set an egg timer for ten or fifteen minutes. If you'd like more detailed instructions and some good tips, try Christopher Calder's excellent site, The Meditation Handbook. Many schools of thought hold that what you are connecting to when you meditate is much, much, more than just relaxation. I tend to agree. But, expectations can be very distracting when you're getting started. It's important that while you're meditating you feel whatever it is you feel. Not, what someone tells you you're going to feel. Once you get the hang of it, you'll have a wonderful way to start your day. You'll also learn eventually how to "re-connect" throughout your day --- take little "vacations" --- any time you want. They won't cost a dime and you'll feel better about things. Bob Steinman (AKA 'Feelbetterman') resides in Orlando, Fl. with his wife, 13 year old son, and a totally spoiled female Shih-Tzu. He is retired following consecutive careers in academics and human services. Presently he aspires to write a definitive self-help book which will present his unique perspective on how to live in harmony with ourselves and our life situations. His web site,Feel Better about Things provides a means to fine-tune his writing and also communicate with those who have interest in his work.
MORE RESOURCES:
Happiness - Google News | | | | RELATED ARTICLES The American Dream - At What Cost? When people are asked, "How many of you are content and happy with what you have?" the reply of an overwhelming majority of people is "Not me." And when they are asked what do they want most out of life, the typical reply is "I want to be happy," as if happy is some kind of a place, like Disneyland or Happy Land. There is a Cure for the Summertime Blues I have never lived anywhere else where when you walk outside in the summer you not only feel like you have walked into a sauna, you also want to change your shirt after just walking from your car to your office (Tallahassee).At the same time, I really can't imagine ever living anywhere else. Health, Wealth, and Love What is happiness? The dictionary defines it as "a state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy."Like many dictionary definitions, this may be accurate, but needs to be more specific to be of practical use. Keys to Happiness "Happiness is the whole aim and end of human existence" - Aristotle, The Nicomachean Ethics"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony" - Mahatma GandhiUnderlying the reasons why clients have come to me over the years is the desire for happiness. What is happiness? Conventional wisdom often defines happiness as status, financial security, worldly goods, possessions, lifestyle, accomplishments etc. Principles of Human Misery / Happiness Sometimes we are so occupied with our daily routine in life that we forget that "we" are the most important element of our existence. We need to be nourished in order to grow. 7 Things Happy People Know How To Do Ever notice how some people just seem to be able to be content and bounce back no matter what the circumstances? Research shows that this isn't a gift or a talent - it's a skill that they have developed. Surprised? Well, the real surprise is that you too can put to work their techniques and make your life happier too. Suffering Since wisdom is the art of coping with suffering, it starts with a willingness to tackle it head-on:a) Such is the harshness of our condition that we suffer, sometimes greatly or worse, insuperably.b) Such is the richness of our nature that we can learn to live happily, or at least serenely, within the limits of this condition. Conditions of Happiness: Happy vs. Unhappy - Do We Have A Choice? Everyone is in the process of seeking greater happiness. We are each involved in the search for feeling good inside our bodies. Your Perfect Partner A woman we'll call "Jane" thought she was a great "catch" and a "perfect partner" but she wondered why her relationships always seemed to fail.Here's what she wrote to us-- "I dated men of various ages and cultures but all my relationships ended up in disaster. Stop Sickies and Make People Happy At Work If you're an employer or a manager then work place absence is costing you money, inconvenience, and upsetting your customers. And as we all know, not all days taken off work are due to genuine sickness. Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight, live in debt, hate their jobs and otherwise live unhappy lives, unable and seemingly unwilling to change. Why? What do these have in common? What is the core issue? Fear, or rather an absence of love. How A Psychovirus May Be Destroying Your Life A pervasive sense of low self-esteem, a feeling of unworthiness, is perhaps the most debilitating belief system that you can entertain.If you feel unworthy, you will destroy hope, initiative, and the power to dream bold dreams. The Great Opportunity I assume you want to be happier. Searching for greater happiness is a wonderful thing whatever level of happiness you are currently at. Have Fun, Make Friends, Be Happy I always marvel at the way people shine when they break through a roadblock in their lives. It's brilliant and it's also incredibly attracting. Life Purpose: How To Be in Love with Life Falling In Love with LifeThere is no feeling in the world like the feeling of energized, on purpose living.Have you ever been in love? You smile easily, you lie in bed for a little longer in the morning letting yourself dream and everything you do seems to have more color, more depth. Ways to Bring Play into Your Life 1. roll around in the grass, and don't brush the grass off. Joy Is Sexy Joy is sexy because in embracing our joy, we embrace our positive energy and power. Joy is always there, waiting to be reclaimed. Why We Have Problems? A Coach Debates As a coach, I often ask myself the question why human beings have problems. With the exception of terminal diseases, serious illnesses that are REALLY life-threatening situations and serious stuff, we do have problems for a number of reasons I will present below. Uncovering Your Joy: Using a Personal Journal to Discover a Life Filled with Happiness Author Tristine Rainer wrote "Happiness within a diary has less to do with the events you encounter in life than with the way you experience the process of living." Because a diary mirrors how you perceive and deal with events, it can be used for developing the capacity to more fully experience joy. Love is All You Need Boiled down to all of our essence, all we really want is to be loved.. |
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